The goal of this blog is to bring mainly positive vibes, but to put things in perspective, this has definitely been a difficult year. If someone would have told me that this year would include a miscarriage, the death of two grandmothers, moving across the state, and the death of our dog, I probably wouldn’t have signed up. I know that everyone has to deal with turmoil and loss, and I can sure speak from experience lately. Through it all though, one has to maintain a positive perspective in order to keep driving onward in life.
We butted heads on this for quite awhile. I wanted to stay put but opportunity came calling. The town we lived in was very comfortable to me. Notice the italics. I have a few really good friends that live there and we both have family not too far away. The underlying problem though was that while I was coasting along, my wife was miserable. She was working increasingly long hours at her job and dealing with countless other work drama that was taking its toll on her. So she started to look around and applied at a few places. Since she really is exceptional at all things she puts her mind to, she was selected. I knew that would happen! After finishing up the interview, she told me that she didn’t want to like it. But she did. A whole lot actually. Before long we had a ‘for sale’ sign up in the yard and buyers within a couple of weeks. This launched the whirlwind and one hell of a wild year long ride.
The thought of a miscarriage never even seemed like something that could happen to us. Until it did. This was one of those days that a person will never forget. As my wife wrote about here, it was the hardest situation we have gone through together. The whole day was a mixture of sorrow and chaos as we drove to doctor appointments in an unfamiliar place and dealt with a cranky toddler who didn’t understand why mommy needed to be seen by nurses and doctors. One of the downsides of moving to a new city is not having anyone to watch our kiddo after daycare closes. When the doctor said that the baby didn’t make it, it was like a punch to the stomach. How could this be? After going through that and seeing the amount of emotional and physical pain my wife had to endure for weeks, I have a whole new level of respect and sympathy for those that have experienced this.
The Loss of Loved Ones
Having two Grandmothers pass away was very hard. Having it happen within two weeks of each other was even worse. They both lived long lives, into their 90’s, but that doesn’t make it any easier. They were my last remaining grandparents as my Grandpa’s had both passed on years ago. Both of them were very mentally strong women and set a wonderful example for my family to learn from. I am very fortunate to have had them in my life.
And most recently we lost our beloved dog. We adopted him around the age of four and he has spent the last eight years with us. It’s amazing how truly attached to a dog one can be. He certainly was a member of the family and he played an important role. He was a stress reliever, comic relief, and he also kept us well exercised with regular walks! Health issues really crept up on him within the last couple of months or so. He had been a very healthy dog up until this point. The last day with us was very emotional. His pain was over but ours was just beginning. Even though he is gone, little things around the house still remind us of him. We will have good memories that we can laugh (and cry) about for a long time.
Life takes us through many ups and downs but I believe these challenging times make us stronger and wiser for the future. What has this past year taught me? I’ve learned to be truly grateful for everything that I have and to not take anyone or anything that I love for granted. It can all change or be gone in an instant. I know that has been said a million times, it’s the truth however. We have grieved for our losses but it is now time to regain focus and look forward towards the future.
I’ve learned to take actions to fix problems, it is a major key. Procrastination will just prolong the frustration and solves nothing. My wife loves her new job and we are getting settled in to our new home and city. Life is way too short to be miserable and her happiness has increased dramatically since the move. To see her stress and misery disappear really has made this change so worth it.
To conclude, I will say again how this past year reinforced my belief of how important it is to keep a positive perspective. Life isn’t always fair and the sooner you can realize that and accept it, you might just see things differently. Little things that used to push your buttons won’t matter as much anymore. Each day is a new opportunity to grow, improve, and experience new possibilities!